I don’t want to come across as some relationship-obsessed harpy and I’m sure once we’ve been seeing each other for long enough he’ll come round – we’re in a relationship in all but name anyway.” I slightly want to bang my head against the keyboard now, not least because I’ve said the same thing more than once in the past.I’m not judging – I can see how easy it is to get into that situation.But if you’re not seeing anyone else, and you’re seeing a lot of each other what on earth is it if it’s not a relationship?
Paulette goes on to say that it’s important to make sure you’re not in post-breakup mode when you get with someone else, as that could be you trying to fill that hole with a new relationship.
Invariably if the person I’m speaking to has been single at any point in the last decade, then yes, they know exactly what I mean, because if there’s one scenario that’s become endemic amongst myself and my peers, it’s our inability to define a relationship after the first five or six dates. Is it too soon to refer to someone as your boyfriend? If you’ve been on 12 dates with someone, you really don’t still want to be seeing other people do you?
According to Pauette, if you dated for less than a year you should wait a month before moving on, and if you dated someone for longer than a year you might need three to four months.
'Most people need a month or two to process the breakup, to mourn, and to integrate lessons before jumping back in if they were in a fairy serious relationship,' she says.
However, if anyone refers to me as his girlfriend in front of him, the colour drains from his face.